Trauma

Everyone has experienced trauma in some form. I often talk about trauma as capital “T” TRAUMA and lowercase “t” trauma.  Capital “T” TRAUMA can be classified as the kind of trauma that might spring to mind when you hear the word trauma: Sexual abuse, domestic violence (experienced by you or witnessed by you as a close family member is victimized), psychological abuse, emotional abuse, spiritual abuse, having a caregiver who is mentally ill or addicted to a substance or incarcerated, or if you as a child experienced the effects of divorce, death, or neglect or abandonment.

Lowercase “t” trauma is any experience you have that you perceive as betrayal, rejection, or a lack of nourishment on physical, emotional, mental, or spiritual levels. We have all had experiences that fall into this category. Childhood is a jungle of opportunities for the joy of exploration, wonder, and awe and it’s also a time when wounding happens in ways that our undeveloped brains and untrained minds don’t yet know how to deal with.

We can also categorize trauma as “complex” or “simple”. Simple trauma is used to describe a single event, such as a car accident. Complex trauma is the result of repeated traumatic events. All forms of trauma impact brain development, the gut microbiome, genetic expression, and adult health, relationships, habits, socio-economic status, educational level, the risk for addiction, emotional and physical resilience, and general well-being. Trauma not only affects how genetics express, but genetic programming also affects how resilient you are in the face of trauma. In other words, trauma is an epigenetic event that can trigger genes coded for autoimmunity and cancer to express as disease. [Read more…] about Do You (and your Immune System) Carry the Effects of Intergenerational Trauma?

Everyone has experienced trauma. Trauma can be experienced as physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual. Research tells us that the physical kind is much easier to recover from than the other three types. We don’t constantly relive our physical trauma in the same way we do our mental, emotional, and spiritual traumas. Physical trauma does not have as much of a conditioning response on our future behavior either.

In addition to the four kinds of trauma, there is also TRAUMA and there is trauma. I call capital “T” trauma the kind you usually think about when you hear the word trauma: physical violence, sexual abuse, emotional and mental and spiritual neglect/abandonment, and undernourishment. This is the kind of trauma I studied in my 2013 Healing Un-Resolved Trauma (HURT) Study. I found that the initial wound along our developmental map created architectural changes in the brain, nervous system and our belief and behavior patterns. These belief and behavior patterns get hooked to the feeling/emotion and sympathetic nervous system response we had at initial wounding and then create a “button” that can be pushed throughout the entire lifetime of the one who experienced the hurt. This leads to illness, chronic disease, relationship problems, and habits of self-neglect, sometimes even early death.

It turns out, according to studies and brain scans, these same changes occur for people who experience trauma spelled with a lower case “t” too. These are experiences of betrayal, rejection, not feeling good enough, beautiful enough, smart enough, strong enough, etc. Yep…same changes in the brain: A growth in the reptilian center (especially the size of the right side of the amygdala) and shrinkage in the adult “executive function” center called the prefrontal cortex. The prefrontal cortex isn’t fully developed until we are roughly 24-26 years of age. So, we revert to our child brain center when our trauma buttons are “pushed”.

When your trauma buttons are pushed your brain begins to function like a zebra who’s being chased by a lion and is afraid it’s about to be eaten. The way information is gathered narrows. The digestive system shuts down (not safe to stop and have a bowel movement with a lion on your tail). The hormones responsible for reproduction (ovaries and testes), cognitive ability, memory, and mood (brain neurotransmitters), blood sugar regulation (pancreas), your weight and temperature and hair and nail health (thyroid), your energy level and fluid regulation (adrenals), and immune system (thymus) are hijacked so your adrenals can take over and allow you to fight, flee, freeze, or faint in the face of this alleged lion. The cortisol that constantly gets kicked into the system to fight your perceived threats breaks down your gut wall and messes with the above systems I just mentioned. This leads to a leaky gut and eventually, you can wind up with autoimmunity and even cancer as a result.

A 2006 study by the National Institutes for Health (NIH) tells us that trauma affects the three important areas of your brain I listed above: the amygdala (your emotional and instinctual center), the hippocampus (your memory control center), and the prefrontal cortex (adult executive function that includes regulating your choices, impulses, and emotions). When your emotional and memory centers are hijacked when your trauma buttons are pushed, it’s difficult to tell that your response is from something in the past…because it’s felt as if it’s brand spanking new in the now. This can lead to a hypervigilant mind that is constantly scanning to make sure you’re safe.

A hypervigilant mind leads to a hypervigilant immune system…autoimmunity and cancer.

The good news is all of this can be changed, rewired, and healed. Your attachment wounding, beliefs, behaviors, and nervous system/emotional responses cannot be changed from the adult brain though. They must be healed in the child brain and a bridge built between the child and adult. This slowly but surely changes your patterns of response and snips the wires to your trauma buttons. It doesn’t happen overnight and cannot be done with a device. You must practice. You must be willing to engage with your whole self and integrate all your parts. You must be willing to forgive yourself, others, and life itself. This brings peace, happiness, and the knowingness that you are of worth no matter what you “do” or how you behave. You are a gift to this world.

When you are fed up with the way patterns of emotional response, behaviors, and physical health issues are showing up in your life you can get started on healing all of them. In my practice, we offer emotional healing packages where you work with me (or with your partner in couples work) 1:1. Therapies offered in packages include EMDR therapy, Brain Spotting, Somatic therapy, Attachment-Informed methods, Cognitive therapy, Internal Family Systems/Parts work, the Enneagram, MDMA Assisted psychotherapy, Human Design, and Expressive methods to help you experience relief and healing. Alternatively, you can begin by engaging in the online healing program called Healing Trauma Through the Chakra System from the comfort of your own home on your computer.

The bottom line is this kind of work requires an integrative approach. In other words, it’s not enough to just talk about your emotional hurts, you also need to repair the damage to your gut, immune system, hormones, and brain. Our packages are integrative and all-inclusive…seeing you as a whole person as you are.

What Is a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP?

The term “highly sensitive person” (HSP) is used to describe people who have a sensitive nervous system that responds to physical, emotional, or social stimuli in a faster and more pronounced way than someone who isn’t as sensitive.

People who have trouble with sensory processing have often been called “too sensitive” for most of their lives by those who do not have sensory processing issues.

Elaine and Arthur Aron, the psychologists who first coined the term HSP in the 1990s, have seen the work they started in the 1990s grow by leaps and bounds.

18 Signs That Say You Might be a HSP:

1. You avoid violent movies, stories, photos or any media that depicts cruelty or brutality of any kind.
2. You feel emotionally exhausted when around people who don’t manage their own energy well.
3. You feel pressured if you have too much to do or are in a time crunch.
4. You need to retreat into quiet stillness to recharge frequently.
5. You have a heightened startle reflex and feel jumpy if surprised by someone or sudden loud noises.
6. You feel and think very deeply.
7. You seek answers to the mysteries of nature, the universe, and life itself.
8. You are sensitive to the fabrics and constriction of your clothing, preferring looser, flowy, natural fibers.
9. You have a low pain threshold.
10. You have a vivid, rich, and vibrant inner world.
11. You are resistant to change.
12. You know that you must be fed on time to avoid being “hangry.
    13. Stimulants create more jumpiness and lead to anxiety.
13. You feel physically ill if there is conflict in your important relationships.
14. You are sensitive to criticism and praise.
15. You are a perfectionist, trying very hard not to make any kind of mistake or misstep.
16. Your senses are finely tuned and music, aromas, tastes, and beauty can move you deeply.
17. You’re often called wise beyond your years because of your ability to read others and your perceptive insight.

What Does this Have to do with Autoimmune Disease?

A hypervigilant mind creates a hypervigilant immune system. Early childhood trauma creates a more finely and tightly wound nervous system. The more you perceive yourself as overwhelmed and unsafe, the more you tap your adrenals glands with the message they must activate your fight, flight, freeze, or faint response. This leads to the release of cortisol into your system which will eventually cause your gut wall to break down (causing leaky gut) and your hormones to become imbalanced, and your immune system to turn on you. You can read more about the link between early childhood trauma and autoimmunity in my book, Solving the Autoimmune Puzzle.

Being Highly Sensitive is Becoming More Common

Being highly sensitive is not a medical diagnosis. It’s thought that 20% of people are highly sensitive. There is some overlap between HSP and introverts, but some HSPs can be extroverts. We live in a society that is very face paced and we are bombarded with stimuli of all kinds from all directions. HSPs have to make it a practice to create a buffer of self-care for themselves to cope with their stressors.

The Ramifications of being a HSP

You might find yourself isolating due to feelings of overwhelm. It’s important maintain your connections with those you love and who love you.

You might find yourself judging the way you easily cry. See if you can celebrate your “heartfulness” and embrace your capacity for caring and compassion.

You might have a history of getting into relationships that are co-dependent, toxic, and abusive. Make sure you connect with the little child inside of you and keep her or him or them safe by making choices for relationships with people that are only supportive and loving.

You might find you are easily offended or affected by other’s emotions, beliefs, or behaviors. See if you can down shift the speed of your mental reactivity to the other people you share this planet with. It will help your nervous system, your hormonal balance, your microbial ecosystem, and your immune system greatly.

Try to avoid over packed schedules, unrealistic expectations of yourself and others, comparing yourself to others, skipping meals and self-care routines, rumination on yours and other’s failures, and violent movies.

How to Heal Your Highly Sensitive Nervous System

The good news is you can heal your nervous system reactivity pathways by healing the part of you that created them. I have put together a course on how to do this that you can do from the comfort of your own home. It’s called the Healing Trauma Through the Chakra System master class. I am offering a free webinar that offers tips, tricks, and information for highly sensitive people and empaths to heal from their past hurts so they can down regulate their nervous system reactivity and their immune system intolerance…while keeping all of the positive aspects of being a beautifully sensitive being who has so much empathy for the suffering of this life and so many incredible gifts to offer this world. During this webinar I will be offering a deep discount on the Healing Trauma Through the Chakra System master class and a free bonus to everyone who registers for the webinar…with a couple of extra goodies to those who attend in person (there will be a replay).

Buddhist psychology provides an elegant way of tracking the mental and emotional worlds and how these intersect with the physical plane. Fear and shame are not considered or labeled necessarily “bad” emotions. In fact, it is taught that if you do not feel shame for harming another, you are at higher risk for repeating the action that could potentially create negative karma. The same goes for fear. We must stay in touch with a certain level of fear that we might cause suffering for another or others. This is meant to motivate us to continually hold each other as loving and luminous beings who are all worthy of compassion and loving kindness. WOW! This feels to me like the antidote for what ails us as a society today.

Buddhist philosophy goes on to identify eight great fears. The eight great fears each have an inner and an outer aspect (microcosm and macrocosm) to how they show up. They each have different rot causes and conditions for arising that are secondary to destructive emotions that are cultivated as a result of attachment, aversion and ignorance; or the three poisons that keep us cycling through an existence that includes suffering. The outer fears come from dangers we believe threaten our property, life, or loved ones and the inner fears cause spiritual endangerment because of the negative karma they can engender through actions that cause us to turn away from treating each other with loving kindness and compassion.

The way these Eight Great Fears are described are as both inner and outer aspects:

1 . Attachment (inner)- Drowning (outer)

Fear comes from the greatest attachment we as humans have, which is to the self or to “I”. This is the largest source of suffering for us. When we believe we are threatened we suffer. And yet, this “I” is actually a projection on a screen. We are not our roles, our bodies, our lives even. We are actually each an emanation of light that emerges from the joy of creation.

The second greatest attachment is to “my”, such as “my daughter”, “my husband”, “my car”, “my house”, “my image”, “my reputation”, and so on and on and on. When the “I” and “my” are perceived as in danger, the ego alarm bells go off and we start to fight, flee, freeze, or faint. The more possessions, power, and perceived purpose we have in this world, the more we will feel like we are drowning in our attachments. COVID has given each of us an opportunity to really contemplate this attachment issue. The greatest attachment we are getting up front and personal with is our desire to have control, to know the outcome, to survive. Fear is generated when we feel “out of control” or like we are losing all we have become attached to.  This kind of fear can feel very much like drowning.

2. Wrong Views (inner)- Thieves (outer)

The reason wrong views are pictured as thieves is because they steal contentment, peace, and equanimity.

If you have the view that reality is only what you can see, feel, hear, smell, or taste then you will suffer when you lose those sensations because you will have the view that you (the “I”) is disappearing and this will create a great deal of fear.

Each of the remaining inner aspects will create its own unique brand of fear that then has an outer symbol or archetype that can serve as a reminder as we travel the road of life.

3. Pride (inner)- Lions (outer)

4. Jealousy and Envy (inner)- Snakes (outer)

5. Anger and Hatred (inner)- Fire (outer)

6. Doubt (inner)- Demons (outer)

7. Greed or miserliness (inner)- Chains (outer)

8. Ignorance (inner)- Elephant (outer)

So, what is the solution? I have found the simple, yet beautiful Practice of Tonglen meditation helps to center me when I am tangled in my attachments, wrong views, pride, jealousy, anger, doubt, greed, or ignorance. HERE is a detailed description of this beautiful practice by Pema Chodron.